Saturday, December 16, 2006

I, FOR ONE, WELCOME OUR NEW PORCINE OVERLORDS . . .


I read an article in the New Yorker (1) last year about the growing threat of feral hogs. Apparently they have become a major nuisance in most of the US, destroying native habitat and species, even uprooting irrigation pipes. Plus, they are so wily and tough that only an expert hunter with at least 4 dogs can defeat one.

Now, I learn that wild hogs may have caused the most recent outbreak of e. coli. It's clear what's going on -- the pigs are trying to kill us! Trichinosis just wasn't doing the job. With all the bacon I've eaten, I'll be the first up against the wall after the piggy revolution (here is where my sweetie Dr. Somneblex thoughtfully points out that he's given up pork).

Coincidentally, I was just reading Oryx and Crake , which features the protagonist being attacked by genetically-altered super-pigs. Clearly, a pig-related horror movie is going to go into production any minute now. A good title would be Hogzilla, after the legendary beast which stalked the woods of Alapaha, Georgia, as seen in this video.



(1)
HOGS WILD.
Authors: Frazier, Ian
Source: New Yorker; 12/12/2005, Vol. 81 Issue 40, p71-83, 12p, 1c
Document Type: Article

Geographic Terms: UNITED States
Abstract: The article traces the history that explains the increasing number of hogs in the U.S. since the 1970s. Hogs are domesticated animals that can survive in the wild and can reproduce quickly and abundantly. In the U.S., the wild hogs descended from ones that escaped from Polynesian Islanders who first brought pigs to the Hawaiian Islands in 750 A.D. During circa 1890, sportsmen with money then imported Eurasian wild boars to stock hunting preserves.
Full Text Word Count: 9704
ISSN: 0028-792X
Accession Number: 19108770
Persistent link to this record: http://0-search.ebscohost.com.alpha.stpaul.lib.mn.us:80/login.aspx?direct=true&db=f5h&AN=19108770&site=ehost-live
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3 comments:

dr_somneblex said...

You notice in the Pioneer Press article that there is only ONE brief mention of the hog e coli connection! I sense a definite cover-up, but you my dear, will not let the truth go unheard. Tell the world, the hogs are going wild!!

ash966 said...

Guess what next year is in the Chinese Zodiac? The Year of the Pig! Scary!

Mali said...

Years ago, I started to collect stories of what I believed was a coming revolution. The number of hunting dogs to turn the guns against their owners was at an all time high, and a deer managed to get hold of a fire arm and shoot back. There was also a group of wild turkeys terrorizing a small town, I believe in New England somewhere. Anyway, around that time I seem to remember reading about a pig who hauled out a rifle and shot a farmer somehow...I can only find one reference to such a story now, so it may be apocryphal--but nonetheless, I think it may be wise to hold off on the bacon.